Study Shows Men are USELESS

A friend of mine posted an article on Fabebook called Women Are Overtaking Men in the U.S. from Sphere.com. It definately made me lqtm (laugh quietly to myself--I'm tryna get this to catch on) since I've been thinking this for years now. I know I sound like I'm contradicting myself when I say I'm not looking for a man but I can't wait to get married. But the reason I say I'm not looking for a man is because I truly don't need one for ANYTHING if I need to be bluntly honest. And I do mean ANYTHING if you can pick up what I'm putting down lol. I know the kind of man that I want to marry and that I will marry and it will be truly a miracle if we ever find each other. I want someone who is educated, motivated to succeed, and who won't tie me down and prohibit me from pursuing my simple plan of world domination. That's all.

When I read this I was happy that research was there to back up my feministic viewpoint.

 "Women really have become the dominant gender," said Guy Garcia, author of "The Decline of Men." "What concerns me is that guys are rapidly falling behind. Women are becoming better educated than men, earning more than men, and, generally speaking, not needing men at all. Meanwhile, as a group, men are losing their way."

I know I always talk to you ladies, but if there are any men out there that can raise their hand and say this is not true, please do so. Because from where I sit in the city of Orlando, there really is no debating on this this. Especially among people of color. It can find 20 females to every one male who has a undergraduate degree or higher. And I think that knowing how much better educated I am than my male counterparts and knowing how truly independent I am makes me a harder catch. I can't take any man seriously who is doing worse off than I am. Especially if he's older than me.

In conclusion--just between us girls--I really and truly feel I will be single for years to come. I refuse to settle just to be with someone and past men I have dated have allowed me to wear the pants financially and it's now a complete turn off. Am I crazy for feeling like I'm too good to be with a guy who hasn't taken the time to invest in himself through school or entreprenuership? Is that really shallow? I don't think so. I'm tryna be a part of relationship that rivals Jay and Beyonce, Swizz and A.Keys, or Barack and Michelle. I want to be a part of something that's ever changing, growing and making a difference. Whether it is just me ending up like Kris Kardashian and Bruce Jenner, I want to be a part of a loving committed situation where my husband is just as successful as me if not better. I say if he can't at least do for me what I am doing for myself then that guy is truly USELESS.

Stay beautiful inside and out!

Milk & Cookies

 It's almost winter and I am looking for sombody I can call boo as Ciara would say. But until I find that special winter wonderland I'm still just bouncing around with the Mr. Right Nows. Don't judge me. We all have needs and some of us aren't afraid to admit it.

Now, like I said, I never thought I'd be sexually active without being married but life has turned out to be that way for me. A tragic tale of blind love (or lust) and crippling heartbreak and here I am two years later as "the cow that's giving the milk away for free." Let's be honest since it's just us girls, most of you are too. We're unmarried and giving away the milk.

The reason I had always wanted to hold on to my virginity is because I saw myself as something special--a prize to be given to the most worthy. And I truly believed that my man was gonna buy the cow. But since that didn't happen and I'm giving away the milk for free, how do I save something special for the man who does decide to buy the cow? That my friends, I call "cookies."

"Cookies" are those little extras that I save only for someone special to me. There a places I am willing to go sexually that won't venture into with just any ol' body. For example, I don't send pictures of my body to random dudes. That's probably one thing guys hate most about me. It's the first thing they need being visual creatures but the last thing I'm willing to give up. I don't like the idea of having my body on display for someone who could give two shits about me. I cringe at the thought that my ass or boobs or 'area' being a part of some loser's phone montage of chicks.

I always told myself I'd be adventurous in the bedroom for my man because we know what they say, "What you won't do another chick will." I truly believe in allowing your man to act out his sexual fantasies with you to maintain a level of excitement and freedom in your relationship. Granted I don't think that will keep him from cheating but I believe the duty of a good woman or wife is to be there for her man on that level.

In conclusion--just between us girls--treat your "cookies" like the deserts of your sexual encounters. Don't give them to just anyone. Guys expect so much from us sexually these days without making any committment. I can't tell you how many times a man has approached me on a first encounter about sex. With sex flooding our mainstream media and music on the regular it's understandable. But in a society where men are getting free milk we just HAVE to make them buy the cookies. Don't be a little freak in the bedroom for just any ol' body. Make a list of things that you want to reserve for your someone special. Make somethings sacred. One thing I have made sacred is my naked body. I also make sex in any place besides a bedroom off limits. Those are just some of the G rated things I can list. Think about some things that you would like to save for that special someone and list them below in the comments. My list is pretty long and some things guys raise eyebrows about but don't get it twisted "shorty is a freak--but only for her man though."

Stay beautiful inside and out!

Rihanna Honored Alongside Michelle Obama?

Ok. Hold on. Rihanna gets honored as Women of the Year along side Michelle Obama? I can't wrap my head around that just yet. I feel like pulling a Kanye and saying "Hold up Rihanna, i'ma let you finish but Tina Turner had one of the best domestic violence stances of all time."

 If you've had the chance to read my blog "Punches and Publicity" you may understand better just why I'm a little speechless on this. Ladies please comment and tell me how you feel about this. I can't deny that Rihanna was brave for staying away from Chris Brown and speaking out about the "incident" but I have been around domestic violence situations and this isn't like the rest.

Rihanna had the pressure of the media to keep her away from Chris Brown. Remember, she went back--as is normal in situations like that--and I believe that if she wasn't under the spotlight she would still be with him. She's right that the feelings just don't go away and it's clear to everyone she still loves him. I guess I'm just a little taken aback that she would be honored for a decision that may have been forced upon her.

In conclusion--just between us girls--does it matter what her true reasons for leaving Chris are? If one young girl decides to leave an abusive relationship because of Rihanna does that warrant an award? I don't know if I can agree. The Woman of the Year award is for HER stance on domestic abuse. I sincerely don't believe she would have chosen to be away from Chris if her career didn't depend on it and if there wasn't so much media pressure.

Stay beautiful inside and out!

Punches and Publicity: Rihanna Speaks Out

I watched the interview of Rihanna on Diane Sawyer and my initial reaction was to be proud of her for staying strong and being able leave Chris. It's obvious that she still loves him. And I'm not gonna lie to you, I've run back a few times to a man who was abusive. No, he never hit me but he was verbally abusive--knew just what to say to make me feel like nothing--and since I thought I loved him, every time he said sorry I was happy to forgive. So I can understand what it takes to be away from someone you love who has made a mistake like this (granted it may be easier with  the media and corporate sponsors pressuring you.)

But before I had the chance to sit down and hear her side of the story I was one of many who didn't even want to hear her side. It's been almost a year since the incident, Chris Brown has done his best to make a comeback with his tarnished image, and I know I have been ready to forgive him. What he did was horrifying but I can't believe he deserves the "Ike Turner" label at such a young age. He made a mistake. But with Rihanna now spilling her guts (leaving out what happened in between the text message and the beating) I couldn't help but say to myself, "Wow. Chris Brown is a monster."

You should all know by now the Twitter addiction I have (follow me: IamDivaGlam) and my twit fam and I talked about the TIMING of this tell-all. Rihanna has a new album scheduled to come out this month. Now if I didn't have a degree in public relations I wouldn't have had such a bad reaction to the idea of her coming clean at this time. It's clear that she is using the beating as publicity for her album. Yes, we want to know what happened that night. But we sincerely cared about what happened that night in FEBRUARY. I understand that this incident may be the inspiration for her new album and an interview does go hand in hand. But for her to not release any statements about the incident prior to now leaves a bad taste in my mouth. As far as I know she never released any statement--her people did to let us know she was okay--but they never advised her to at least say she couldn't speak for legal reasons or whatever the case may be. Waiting until her album is ready to drop to spill all is just distasteful. I follow Cynamin Jones on Twitter and she said, "Girls needed your voice THEN. Not now."

In conclusion--just between us girls--I believe that overall Rihanna is a brave young woman for going what she went through and deciding that she needed to be apart from the man she loves. And as a celebrity she doesn't owe us the details. It never hurts to clear up rumors but in the end our questions about that night could have remained unanswered. Her timing however is in poor taste. She says she doesn't want this to damage Chris' career but how can it not? Seeing those images, hearing that he may have been cheating, imagining Chris with "no soul" aren't doing anything to build his image.

The main issue is the domestic violence though. I grew up with it first hand and like Rihanna I vow to never be that woman. If you or anyone you know is a victim of domestic violence I encourage you to speak out and get help. All too often I see it as common among people of color but IT'S NOT OKAY. Like Rihanna says "Eff love." That may be the only way to guarantee you will live. You can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline 24 hrs a day at 1.800.799.SAFE or visit them online http://www.ndvh.org/

Stay beautiful inside and out.